The things I think about before I sleep…
Ok, there are lots of things that run through my mind before I fall asleep. I’m sure this happens to everyone, especially if you have trouble sleeping.
In this particular case, Jason is sleeping next to me but I always feel this inclination to go through his phone. I’m sure he would let me do this even if he’s not sleeping, but because I’ve always found things in the past while snooping it’s just in my blood now. Although I usually hold back. There’s a saying, “whatever you’re wanting to find, you’ll probably find it.” Don’t quote ME on this however. But my point is, I hold myself back from snooping because I don’t want to find something I don’t want to see.
Yes it shouldn’t be there anyway, he should be faithful to you, if you’re thinking like this why are you with him, so many things. The human mind is so powerful, but I don’t appreciate its way to overthink things. SOMEthings in particular.
Should I? Shouldn’t I? It’s always the question…
The trust has definitely grown over the months, but there’s always going to be this thought or memory in the back of my mind… But for some reason, these past few weeks it’s been more centered in my mind. I just can’t forget what happened. I think it especially sparked when we were cleaning his apt and I found a paper with her name and info on it (looked like a resume). This completely changed my mood and brought back these emotions and memories that I wanted to lock up.
Sighhh, just late night thoughts. Please tell me someone’s been in my shoes and/or has some advice for me.
@5 months ago
